Gratitude and Thanksgiving

I love this picture! Lindsay fell down and Lauren knelt down to check on her! I am so grateful for my children! And I'm so thankful for simple love.

I was asked to give a talk last week at church. It was after a bad day of cramps and bleeding due to the start of our third miscarriage and I wasn't sure I'd have the strength to stand and talk. I woke up Sunday morning feeling ready and excited to share my message of gratitude. I didn't feel sorry for myself I felt empowered by my strength and testimony. I also felt I had too much to be grateful for to not give the talk. After church I soon felt weak again and it was straight back to bed! But I was so happy God gave me the strength to get through our church service. So here is my talk. It is a long post I know. But I want it here in my journal. If you don't have a place in your heart for religion you need to not bother to read it. But I know I will be so grateful I have saved my thoughts and feelings here to look back on.

My talk went sort of like this:

I am so grateful to be at church today. I’m grateful for this ward building, for the sacrament and for all of your friendly faces. I’m also very grateful for this thanksgiving holiday. However I am not exactly thankful to be up her because I strongly dislike giving talks at church. It’s a bit uncomfortable and I worry I’ll say the wrong thing and not express myself in the way I truly feel, just because it is hard to be up in front of people. Last time I gave a talk I cried though most of it. If any of you remember. It was so embarrassing because it was the ugly cry! You now they kind of cry where you make a really ugly face and you know people are embarrassed to look at you! I can’t even believe I was asked to give a talk again after that one. So I won't cry today! Dan doesn't believe me so he has to give me a pedicure if I don't cry!!! I know your all here to feel the spirit and learn of the gospel please keep in mind that I’m not a religious scholar or a great public speaker. That’s not my talent in life. But I do have the gift of a grateful heart. I have much that I am grateful for. This week we will all have the opportunity to celebrate thanksgiving and think of what we have gratitude for. I bet each of you like me, has a long list of things you’re grateful for. I could take easily take up ten minutes reading some of my list but it is infinite. It has no end. I have no end for the gratitude of my blessings.

A few years ago my husband emailed me a quote from Ezra Taft Benson. It was on gratitude. I love this quote and I have kept it saved on my desktop and read it from time to time.

"We need to be more grateful. I think there's no true character without gratitude. It's one of the marks of a real strong character, to have a feeling of thanksgiving and gratitude for blessings that are ours.We need more of that spirit in our homes, in our daily associations, in church, everywhere. It doesn't cost anything. It's so easy to cultivate the spirit of appreciation and gratitude. And it's so easy, also, to be dissatisfied and to be envious of other people." Ezra Taft Benson


It is so easy to have feelings of gratitude. And like president Benson said it does not cost anything. It uplifts us for free. But it is also just as easy to focus on the negativity. We can make a choice to choose gratitude rather than be destitute. Just this past few weeks I can think of plenty to complain about but by doing that I miss out on the uplifting moments to think of my blessings. My sister called with news of possible breast cancer, my other sister is worried about loose her house and their job, my mom called and said my grandma needs to have heart surgery again is likely to have another heart attack and I also lost something very special this week. With everything going on this past week and month and I still just couldn't stop my self from being happy! Its not that I don't have concern or worry its just that I find power in gracious living. I choose to be happy because my list of reasons to feel gratitude is endless. And mostly we always have more blessings than opposition because of our Heavenly Fathers love. It always outweighs the negative. There is power in gracious living.

Well known author Melody Beattie, wrote
Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance,chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast,a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today,and creates a vision for tomorrow.

I believe when one finds gratitude their life changes. You can turn your life around by living daily with gratitude. A certain calmness and inner peace and joy is found in a life lived with gratitude. Most of my feelings of gratitude can be attributed to my testimony.
My involvement with the gospel of Jesus Christ has only brought me gratification, happiness, love…I had a friend recently tell me that she left the church when she found the truth and that when she was LDS she was living ignorantly and while her own ignorance was bliss she felt she couldn't’t think for herself. I disagree and I know without a doubt she is wrong. It is not ignorance but rather knowledge and knowledge is power. I am empowered because I believe in Jesus Christ. No, I am not better than anyone else for it but I have become a better person because of it. I could never deny the gospel after the good it has shown to me. I admit it may be easier to say I don't believe. I could wear tank tops, see an R rated movie, drink alcohol (which I don't like anyway), go to Costco on Sunday when it is not crowded and never feel guilt about anything and we would’t get to share 10% of our earnings and so on. No thanks! I'll wear my modest clothes, watch uplifting movies, say prayers with my children and only be with one man. I'll keep doing service and teach my children to be forgiving and to believe in a higher power. It is not always effortless but it is indeed worth it. I'd rather have faith in this world and be spiritually strong than not be. And Yes, I told my non believing friend I can still think for myself. And yes I am empowered by this truth and I feel much gratitude because of it!

In True to the Faith, a church booklet it says:

Gratitude is a feeling of appreciation and thankfulness for blessings or benefits we have received. As we cultivate a grateful attitude, we are more likely to be happy and spiritually strong. We should regularly express our gratitude to God for the blessings He gives us and to others for the kind acts they do for us.
In D & C 78:19 the Lord promises us
"He who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious" (D&C 78:19). Gratitude is an uplifting, exalting attitude. People are generally happier when they have gratitude in their hearts. We cannot be bitter, resentful, or mean-spirited when we are grateful.

True to the Faith booklet also reads:
We should be thankful for the wonderful blessings that are ours and for the tremendous opportunities we have. We can be thankful to our parents, family, friends, and teachers. We should express appreciation to everyone who has assisted us in any way.
We should thank our Heavenly Father for His goodness to us by acknowledging His hand in all things; thanking Him for all that He gives us, keeping His commandments, and serving others. We should especially thank Him for His Beloved Son, Jesus Christ, for the Savior's great example, for His teachings, for His outreaching hand to lift and help, for His infinite Atonement.
—See True to the Faith (2004), 78–79

I am grateful for the atonement and I know what we are taught is true; He who receiveth all things with thankfulness shall be made glorious! We do get to feel that glorious power in gratitude when we are not mean spirited and we express feelings of thanksgiving. We are given more direction on how to live this way in

THE BOOK OF PSALMS
PSALM 100

A Psalm of praise—Serve the Lord with gladness, all ye his people—Be thankful unto him and bless his name.

A PSALM OF PRAISE.
1 Make a joyful noise unto the Lord, all ye lands.
2 Serve the Lord with gladness: come before his presence with singing.
3 Know ye that the Lord he is God: it is he that hath amade us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.
4 Enter into his gates with a thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name.
5 For the Lord is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth endureth to all generations.


In primary this past month we have learned this simple verse in Doctrine and Covenants 59:7
Thou shalt thank the Lord thy God in all things.

I am very happy, very blessed and have overwhelming gratitude for my life. What I have to be grateful for is infinite. I sometimes do think of the things that are not right in this world but I don’t let it bother me and often time I feel almost feel selfish because of my contentedness. I know it helps that I have faith and I guess I can contribute much of my happiness from that. I want everyone to know this and I hope to teach my children this that no matter what is going on you still have choices. Choose to be happy. Choose to submit yourself to Gods will. Choose to be a better person than you were yesterday. Choose daily to recognize your blessings and always carry the spirit of gratitude. Remember the gospel is power and it will bring you happiness. Happiness is also powerful. Find the truth for your self and live it and live it with all the thankfulness you have in your heart.

President Gordon B. Hinckley said

"May we live worthy of the glorious endowment of light and understanding and eternal truth which has come to us through all the perils of the past. Somehow, among all who have walked the earth, we have been brought forth in this unique and remarkable season. Be grateful, and above all be faithful."

I am thankful for my husband and children and for the rest of my family. I am also thankful for Michelle Madruga for bringing me chocolate chip cookies yesterday. I'm thankful to serve your wonderful children in the primary. As I said before my list of things I feel gratitude for is never ending. I'm grateful to know I have a Savior. I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ , Amen.


I wish you all a happy thanksgiving.

Kissing the Garden Goodnight

This post is over two months old but better late than never! I was waiting until I could find the picture of the girls kissing the garden goodnight.

October notes - Our garden is officially closed for the season. Pretty much every thing died when we had that little bit of snow. No more fresh herbs and vegetables. Yesterday I pulled out all of the dying flowers in our flower bed and Dan has started to blow the leaves into piles. We are moving closer to winter, although the weather is still amazing and the golden trees through out Alpine are gorgeous.

The girls will miss the garden but we will let them help us plant next spring. I remember this summer Lauren kissing the garden good-night. Here are a few cute "girl talk" moments I want to remember.


One night this summer we walked in the garden just before bedtime. Lauren decided to kiss all of the plants goodnight. She was singing and dancing between the planter boxes and leaning over to kiss each leaf. It was pretty funny and soon Lindsay joined in on the garden dance. Something must of worked because a week later we had a dozen huge cucumbers, lots of peppers and the cantaloupe finally started to grow.

A few weeks later the kids were eating cantaloupe and Lindsay offered me a bite of hers. She was so cute wanting to share with me. I don't like cantaloupe and told her no thanks, I don't like it. Lauren went crazy and shouted "WHAT? You don't like it? Come on you have to try it! You have to try new things, you'll like it"! She sounded just like me trying to get them to try something new. I had to laugh. So I promised to try a bite and told them that we have more cantaloupe growing in our garden. Lindsay was so excited that we actually have cantaloupe in our own garden and she said, "Really...Oh Mommy, that is sooo nice."

Other cute moments-

Lauren and I were playing at home and she said out of the blue, "Mom I wish you could have your baby". I told her that was sweet and that Daddy and I will try. She replied, "Cause you don't have one yet...Jesus is going to get one for you". A few minutes later she said, "Remember when I was a baby in your tummy? Cause I told you you're gonna have a baby". "We can have a baby brother so when he grows up we can play with him and have so much fun together as a family". I guess she really wants me to have a baby. She has been talking about it for a year and tells people all the time.

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I asked the girls to get ready to get in the car and Lauren said, "No, we are playing our game. Its called good guys and bad guys and the good guys are trying to save their babies in this princess crown. Isn't that cool"? I don't know where she came up with this game, she is either very creative or was just really bored!

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I don't know where they came up with this word but the girls always refer to yesterday as "Lasterday" or "Last day" or "Lastgo".

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Translations of Lindsay's language:
"I love jew" = I love you
"Mamma jew my shunshine" = Mom, you're my sunshine

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Lindsay loves to look at the stars just like her Mom and Nana Lyle. She often will ask to go out on the deck or front porch to look at the stars. One week late in the summer she was star gazing and enthusiastically said, "Mom, come here! Hurry come look at the stars they look like an ogstacle course"! She was trying to say they looked like an obstacle course. Another time she said the stars were making a pattern! She is so cute. She has also asked if she can be a shooting star for Halloween.

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When I say we don't have money for something the girls like to remind me that Daddy has money. Yes, Daddy has lots of coins in his office so we can buy whatever we want!

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At the video store one day Lindsay said, "MOM! LOOK this is my favorite movie I've NEVER seen"!

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The girls love to play with my jewelry. Lauren keeps asking me when she can have my wedding ring. I told her when she is a big girl a nice boy will marry her and give her a ring. She said, "I want to marry Daddy, I don't want to marry a different boy. I want to marry Daddy and stay in thissss family"!


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Lauren walked up to me and said, "Mom I have to tell you something special about you that I love". I asked her what? She replied, "your heart". (aah, how she makes me melt)

Hope & Pippy!

Hope is a great word. It invokes a warm feeling inside. Everyone has hope and everyone loves to hope.

When I was in elementary school I had a friend named Hope. She only lived in our area for one year. She was staying with her christian grandparents while her own mother got her life in order. She and her sisters, Faith and Charity, were placed with family members due to their moms inability to be the kind of mother they deserved. But Hope was so full of the meaning of her birth name, she had a wish for something greater than her experiences and expected fulfilment of her wishes. She never doubted. She had brown freckles, gangly longs legs that were so bouncy and an upbeat disposition. She wore her long blond hair in braids and was a bit tomboyish! A blond Pippy Longstocking! I enjoyed the year I had her as a friend. I learned the meaning of Hope through her. How could one little girl be taken from her mother and still be happy and bouncy? She really had hope! I attended church with Hope and her grandparents one Sunday. In that one day I memorized the names of the books of the New Testament. I was proud of myself. But I was more proud to have Hope as a friend.

I still have Hope. Hope exists within me daily. I hope for my parents to be healthy and to always find meaning in their lives. I hope for my father to know he has a father in heaven. I hope for my sister to not get breast cancer (it runs in our family genes). I hope for my other sister to have a new home and new PTA president (ha ha). I hope for my little girls to be strong and to make good choices. I hope for my husband to know how incredible I think he is. I hope for sunny days and clear skies. I hope for Jackie to find out how powerful and beautiful she is. I hope to laugh out loud every day. I hope to learn forgiveness every time it is needed. I hope to bake a really good cake from scratch. I hope to get organized. I hope to go back to Russia and China and hug my former students. I hope to read the news and see people making money and not loosing jobs. I hope to run another marathon when it is not raining. I hope to have one more baby and see a little heartbeat on an ultrasound. I hope, I hope I hope!!!

I love Hope. If anyone happens to know of a 34 year old woman named Hope who has a sister named Faith, send her my way so I can say hi. I miss her but I still have her with me. I embrace Hope daily.

PS. Shell & Steph, you should watch this pippy clip...it totally brings back memories of Saturday mornings when we were kids.

Messy Monsters Part Two!

I bought my sweet little girls the umbrellas that they dreamed of. They were so happy. Just take a look at how cute they are holding them and dancing with them. I thought for sure I was onto something and could expect them to continue cleaning because of the benefits. It didn't last longer than a day. I focused on the kitchen for one hour just to clean up and make dinner and look what happens. Messy little monsters are at it again! No they didn't toilet paper the house this time. They just left stickers on the wall, took all the cushions off the sofa, dumped a box of cereal, and you know how the story goes. I found them hiding in the corner with a can of whipped cream and ice cream cones and of course Lindsay was naked, I promise she has clothes. It feels like groundhog day at the Hausers! A broken record in my head of the silly clean up song!

fire and prayers

UPDATE: After I posted this a few heroes came to the rescue and saved the neighborhood.
This photo is taken from my Aunts drive way...scary!
Please start praying. Southern California is on fire again and it is concentrated in Orange County, my old stomping grounds. It happens so often and each time until now, I have been lucky it wasn't near my friends or families homes. Always close but not too close. My favorite "Aunt" Renee along with her family has been evacuated tonight from her home in Anaheim Hills. I'm a nervous wreck! 50 homes less than a mile from her have been destroyed. They fled their home with the dog and computer but had no time to grab anything else. My uncle John left in such a hurry that he forgot his wallet and cell phone. He has no identification. I'm worried they will loose everything. As they were leaving they saw their neighbor's palm tree catch fire. Please pray for them and everyone around them. Orange, my former home town, is also on fire and my former church building is near the flames, as well as many homes of my old friends. Please keep them in your prayers tonight. Thanks.

try again

November 15Th - For several nights now I have been dreaming that I am pregnant and then I wake up and have a full bladder. Several times last night I woke up, well I was half awake but too tired to get out of bed to go to the bathroom. Again I was dreaming and this time of me taking a pregnancy test. So at 6:40 AM this morning on Saturday, November 15, I took a pregnancy test. POSITIVE!!! Oh, happy day! I am so excited. I began to giggle and jump and then laugh out loud so much that I thought I might wake up Dan. I peeked and he was still sound asleep. I started to think of fun ways to tell him but not sure if I could wait. Lindsay woke up. I carried her back to bed and was still beaming and I had to tell someone. So I said, "Lindsay Mommy is going to have a baby for you. I have a baby in my tummy". She gasped, her eyes went wide open, she smiled, hugged me and then went back to sleep. I went back to my room to my sleeping bear and stared at him until he woke up. He said asked if I was pregnant. I jumped on him and shouted, "You're a stud! Yes, I am pregnant"! For the past three years we have debated when we should have another baby and if we should even have one. At first I wasn't ready for another one and then I started running and wanted to complete my marathon. But the girls constantly talk about having a baby brother or sister. We decided to give it six months and if no baby Dan could get snipped. October 14Th I discontinued birth control. October 20Th Dan returned from his California trip. I am now I think 6 weeks pregnant. Nice work Dan, knocked me up with one shot! Is this too much information? I took a few pregnancy test a few weeks ago because I was having symptoms. I didn't think I would get pregnant right away but I was so sleepy and craving cream cheese won tons like crazy. Both test were negative. But with other symptoms and our intuition we decided on one more test. We have told a only few people and our families. So I won't post this for a few more weeks until I have had an ultrasound.


November 17 - After the first ultrasound:
The first ultrasound shows me behind six weeks which was confusing because she couldn't find a sac. I also had unusual spotting. My suspicion is an early miscarriage. I am no stranger to disappointment. Yes, I have much to be happy about but I know disappointment when it comes to pregnancy. I have already had two miscarriages. My first pregnancy was a gruesome and painful miscarriage. The second one resulted in a DnC. The third pregnancy I had blood clots, bed rest and 14 weeks of Dan giving me shots. But it also resulted in my first beautiful baby, Lauren! The fourth pregnancy I took hormones but it wasn't so bad and I ended up with my little joy Lindsay Jane. So here I am at my fifth pregnancy and hoping things would be smooth sailing. After all I am a veteran to this. Unfortunately it hasn't been so easy.

One week later - I had my third miscarriage and another DnC. Its OK. We will try again. Its funny though how when you want to be pregnant everywhere you go you see beautiful pregnant women. I stayed home for a week. We missed Thanksgiving at Bill and Brenda's but they understood. We have to wait a few months before we can try again.

messy little monsters

My little girls are actually helping me clean today! Is this for real? Is the Hauser home entering a new stage? Is this too good to be true? They have tried to help me clean before but usually just make a bigger mess as though it was a game. But today they're taking it seriously! Lindsay tried to make her bed and put away her laundry. Lauren tried to mop the floor and is picking up all of her toys! I praised them for the great job they were doing. I told them I was going to buy them a Little Mermaid umbrella because they were being so good. Lauren ran over to me crying, she hugged me and said she was so sad because I was being so nice. What? OK, I think she meant to say she was crying happy tears because she is getting her umbrella that she has been asking for the past few months. I just laughed and gave her a big hug. She is the best girl ever! She has matured so much over the past few months. Today I feel like a lucky mom.


Typically when I leave them unattended it means trouble. Like the last time I updated my blog/journal. I walked out of my office to find that the basement had been toilet papered, Lauren was wearing a costume and Lindsay was streaking! I wonder what they are doing right now? I can hear the noisy footsteps upstairs and I know they're running around and I can also hear Lindsay howling. I'm sure I will have a mess to clean up! At least today they feel like helping.

OBummer

Barack Hussein Obama will be our new president. I'm not nearly as upset as I thought I would be! He actually gave a great speech last night, as did John McCain. Both men acted respectfully. I was proud of McCain, offering to reach out to Obama and help if needed and proud of Obama for publicly saying he would work with him. I'm excited about the possibilities that have opened in the minds of young black Americans. They may now choose to have more hope for themselves, a better outlook on life and strive toward better education within their poorer communities. I was disgusted by those who admitted this morning that they committed voter fraud and voted multiple times for Obama. And I was equally disgusted by the Black Panthers, this isn't 1960! I just hope if Obama gets his wishes for socialism that the American people will not get even more lazy and wait around for government hand outs. I'm concerned that Obama wouldn't pass a background check to join the FBI however he is deemed qualified to be our president. I have so many thoughts on this election and so many more on Obamas questionable track records and associations but I don't have the time to write about it today. So at another time, I'll add it here in my journal. But for now I'll just say that I have the audacity to sincerely hope he does a good job and proves me wrong. His little girls are gorgeous and what an exciting life waits ahead for them! But whats up with Michelle?? Who helps her with her wardrobe? That dress was hideous!!! Somebody please help Michelle!

Robin Hood & Walt Disney

I just heard the Robin Hood songs online and I had to laugh out loud! I love this music. Walt Disney was a genius and his legacy will live on forever! I want every original Disney song ever recorded for Christmas.

Growing up Robin Hood was one of my favorite Disney cartoons. Good boy Robin Hood running through the forest with Big John stealing from the rich to pay the poor. It occurred to me that he is a bit like Obama. Bummer...I should have voted for Obama today. HA HA! Remember what Friar Tuck said, "Praise the Lord and pass the tax rebate". Or may be Obama is more like the nasty Sheriff of Nottingham who robs from Friar Tuck and puts anyone in jail who goes agianst him. Or he might do a background check on you if you disagree and show it to the world. Sound familiar?